Sunday, 30 December 2012

Eavesdropper from Hawaii 2nd episode

A free Lunch for unemployed

Hi Eavesdropper in NZ, this is Young Willey in Hawaii [one of your secret eavesdroppers] reporting as promised: Firstly you might have read this in Scoop the best news blog site: It’s from a story by Mark Williams and Alastair Thompson:

“Two unemployed men who claim Prime Minister John Key agreed to "spring for" their meal at the famed political watering hole The Green Parrot on Monday night, instead found them-selves arrested for theft, forcibly removed from the building and locked in jail.
The two men, Kent Boyd and Andre Jellema (who tell their story via a YouTube video), both unemployed, were enjoying what they describe as their one night out a year - for Christmas - when they encountered the PM and his Diplomatic Protection Squad officers in Wellington's Green Parrot café bar.

Mr Boyd and Mr Jellema say they decided that they would approach the DPS and ask if the PM would be willing to take a photo with them. Mr Boyd said he is a fan of John Key and voted for him at the last election.

The DPS declined (allegedly somewhat impolitely) but the men approached the PM directly and asked him instead.

He was much more obliging and they took [a] picture of. Boyd and Jellema with PM John Key and several other restaurant patrons then also asked for pictures with the PM and he very obligingly agreed to do so.
According to Kent Boyd after this was all over the PM - who was sitting around 10 feet away from them - asked them what they did for jobs. At which point they told him they were unemployed.

"I told him that this was my special night out and then asked him if he would be willing to spring for our meal," Mr Boyd told Scoop.

According to Boyd the PM replied, "Absolutely". [Scoop ends]

Well just last night, here in Hawaii, the PM [John] and Bronagh [His wife] were chatting about the event after a day on the beach and a wonderful dinner prepared by their super chef Hanna.
Since it involved members of the Diplomatic Protection Squad I should point out that they were not part of our team, they were in fact team B members, and have yet to fully comprehend the quirky ways of our PM and master.

“John dear, did you really offer to pay the bill for those two poor unemployed gentlemen in Wellington last week? asked Bronagh rather sweetly.

“Sorry dear what was that again”, said John

“You remember dear, the two unemployed chaps at the Green Parrot bar who asked you to shout them a meal, and you said you would, I think that was rather sweet of you”, she said kindly.

“Oh that, I’m sorry dear I can’t really remember because it was really crowded being Christmas and all that”, he replied as he sipped a wonderful glass of French red.

“Come on John you must remember because your protection squad arrested them and tossed them into the cells for the night, surely they told you about it”, she said sounding a little upset.

“No I’m sorry love, but I simply can not remember and I do have far more important matters to attend to, and to expect me to remember every little thing doesn’t make sense”, John uttered rather unconvincingly in my view, and I’m a secret agent and we are trained to recognise fibs…

“I’m starting to get really worried dear, in fact I’ve been worried about it for some time now”, she said with a note of seriousness.

“Worried about what darling”, replied John.

“Your memory, of late it just seems to have become awfully poor, almost non-existent, should you seek advice from our doctor, I can make an appointment if you want”, she said gently.

“Dear you are starting to sound like the leader of the Labour Party, what’s his name, David something…or other. There is nothing wrong with my memory at least not in my mind, so let’s just forget this discussion shall we, and relax, he said sounding very much like Margaret Thatcher.

“But, those two poor unemployed gentlemen have spent a night in jail, over a hundred dollar food bill that you promised to pay”, she said.

“It wasn’t a hundred dollars it was eighty two dollars” shouted John.

“Got you that time”, retorted Bronagh laughing loudly” adding “I thought you couldn’t remember”.

“S***“, said John, “You sound like Winston Peters”.

“Now dear there is no need to swear, remember I’m not Hekia Parata”, she said happily.
“Yes I know, sometimes I wish you were, we’d have a lot less trouble if you were”, muttered John meekly.

 But the outcome has been constructive for the PM has set as his 2013 New Years resolution,

‘I will always tell the truth and practice memory control’, I’ve been told John Banks John’s good buddy has the same resolution.

The following is from the Scoop story on the subject of how a meal for two unemployed gentlemen has turned into a court case:

“Asked whether the PM could confirm or deny that he had agreed to "spring for" the two men's meals a spokeswoman for the Prime Minister said, "This is a matter for the police and we have no comment to make." (UPDATE 5.10pm 21/12/12: "The PM was never asked to pay, nor did he offer to pay for these meals.")

The Police inspector in charge of the Diplomatic Protection Squad was similarly unwilling to comment on the incident saying initially that it was before the court and that he could therefore not comment on it, but then later said that he didn't actually know whether the PM had agreed to "spring for " the meal or not.

But when they said to the manager that the PM was picking up the tab for the meal, the manager disputed this and spoke to the security officers. Moments later Boyd and Jellema were grabbed had their arms pushed behind their backs and were taken outside to separate locations. The DPS officers who grabbed them then called in a further six uniformed police officers who arrested them Boyd says that he offered to pay for the meal in the hope that he would then be let go but this was refused.
The two men then spent the night in the cells and when they appeared in court the following day found they had also been charged with theft for the $82 cost of their meal.
Mr Boyd's lawyer Wellington Barrister Keith Jeffries says the incident smacks of a Dad's Army comedy sketch.
"On the basis of their story it was a massive over-reaction by the security detail, all they needed to do was ask John Key if he had agreed to pay for the meal or not. Then after Mr Boyd offered to pay for the meal they wouldn't let him do so, that seems unfair.
"I would describe it as an absolute comedy with the tragedy being that someone had to be detained in a cell over night for it."

Have a great New Year and keep your resolutions down to ones that can be achieved.

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